Sep 19, 2013

In The Interim : The Struggles We Don't Share

Details: Dress / F21 , Hat , Socks & Belt / Urban Outfitters,
Shoes (similar) / Courtesy of Lulus , Necklace / Courtesy of Violet Bella

I was reading a blog the other day where they were basically saying they feel like most people's "blog" lives don't seem real. I started thinking about this a lot over the past few weeks and I realized that in a way it is true. We portray ourselves the way we want the world to see us sometimes, in order to seem like we've got it all together. After giving it a little bit of thought I realized that this is probably due to people wanting to seem more positive and less "Debbie Downer" all the time. I mean who would want to read about every struggle right? It's not really my style to put my negative emotions onto anyone else. Some things are personal, and I completely think that it's fair to keep those things to yourself. I do however think that it's important to be honest with your readers, when dealing with issues that they can relate to because that's where growth happens. When you can really connect with someone because of situations that have happened or are happening.

For me the past few months haven't been a huge piece of cake. There's been frustrating times as of late where I wonder if I'm doing the right things, and where I wonder if what I have to offer is good enough. Here I am a 20-something who just finished her third degree, and I can't seem to land a job that I want. Frustrations have been running high around here and I have days where I just blame myself, and think that I'm not good enough. I know those feelings won't last and usually I snap out of it, but it's still frustrating nonetheless. I went back to school because I wanted to pursue my passion, but what people don't tell you is that reaching that passion isn't just a one stop shop after graduation. There are twists and turns, and leaps and bounds that need to be made. Nothing is guaranteed. Ever.

One thing I've realized? It's easy to throw a pity party, and it's easy to just assume what you have isn't enough to carry you over into the next step of your life. If you truly believe in your qualities and what you have to offer, something is bound to come along that's a good fit. And these types of things can't really be forced, ya know? I try to tell myself this every time I get frustrated with my situation. Life isn't peachy all the time. I know I am doing the best I can in this moment, and staying positive is a huge part of that. I think we're all entitled to our bad days though right? The ones where tears just need to come down so you can get yourself together and say "Hey got this. You always did, you just need to go through the struggle to find where you need to be." Nothing in life is easy, I truly believe that...and I think it's easier to focus on the negative than the positive, but trust me...the positive is a lot of more gratifying.


  1. Love the shoes and the knee highs! So cute

  2. Great outfit! the dress is soo cuteee

    Natalia xo

  3. The market continues to be tough so don't be too hard on yourself. We're all struggling one way or another.

    I try to keep my blog positive too as I see it as my escape from my daily worries and troubles (and I have quite a few). Sometimes I share them if I feel compelled, otherwise, my personal friends know about it (because I'll complain on my Facebook lol!)

  4. Oh darling I completely empathize with this post! I am going after my second degree right now and I really struggle with it sometimes. Even thought I am going to school for what I love, I still feel like I am stuck and not moving forward. But the truth is that we are! We will find our way, it is all trial and error and each "mistake" brings us a little closer to our goal!

    There is really no such thing as a mistake. There are only opportunities or learning experiences. :)

    This Lovely Little Day

  5. I feel like we must have read the same post a few weeks ago, I definitely agree that the life we put out on the internet isn't always a direct reflection of what we go through day to day, but as you stated, no one really wants to read the struggles we go through. Maybe its an entire cultural shift we need to make, all of us, to change what we put out there, and then (hopefully) change what is expected of us.

    I wrote a post a little over a week ago about Imperfection after realizing that I seriously focus on making everything look perfect before posting, and that's not real life either (you can check it out here: )

    Anyway, great post, I appreciate the honesty of it.

  6. I know exactly what you mean. I don't have many readers so I feel pretty comfortable presenting my life the way it really is, frustrations and all! Maybe if my audience was huge I'd edit a little more but then what would be the point? If someone is not into my "Debbie downer" days there's a little red X they can click.

  7. I hope you get a job you want soon. How does it work that you can have 3 degrees at 20? In my country we only finish school at 18 and then a degree takes 3-4 years, so you'd be at least 21 after getting your first degree.

    1. hey lady, i'm actually 26 so I graduated with my BA in education & psychology in 2009 and then finished up my associates in 2013.

  8. Hold on for that good fit! It will happen.
    Marie @
    In Our Happy Place

  9. hang in there, friend. everything will always work out. :) you are pursuing what you love and that is what is most important!

    looking as fabulous as ever. love those knee-highs! i can't wait to wear mine more often now that the temps are cooling off.

  10. Love that print with those adorable boots! Alex

  11. Nothing is ever as easy as it seems. You are smart, talented, gorgeous, and genuinely kind, and those things will all get you far. You're going to do great, no matter what ends up happening. xo

  12. I know what is like to finish a degree and think "what now?". When I finished my photography degree I thought that everything would be easy and fun and that I would have the job of my dreams but the truth is that never happened. After I did my internships I've been looking for a job and nothing. And sometimes I feel that what I did was just a waste of time and I don't want to think that because I love photography, but here in Spain it's a really rare job.
    Anyway, I try to keep myself distracted going to courses.

    And after that huge paragraph I have to say that I love that dress. It reminds me of Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz.

    Maria x

  13. The outfit looks beautiful! :)

  14. I like the outfit, but what I really loved was the sentiment behind this. I sometimes think that people do forget that It Is Not Fun to read about unhappiness- or at least more than every once in awhile. It can be hard to want to compare one's life to someone else's online one but the answer isn't for the blogger to bear all- how painful for them besides.

    This post does a great job of balancing honesty with keeping things positive and private. I hope things start looking up with jobs and in general, all that said!

  15. I know how you feel. I just think this age is hard. Especially with the crappy job market. I'm terrified of the epic job hunt ahead of me but I'm also so ready to be done with grad school. It gets really difficult, but a good nap always seems to help pep me back up a little. I really hope things start looking up for you!

    I don't think bloggers have to share everything. I never understand when people complain about bloggers being positive. If they can't figure out that those people can't possibly have perfect lives - because those don't exist - then they're idiots.

    But anyway! I love this outfit. This dress is adorable on you. Such a cool belt too.

  16. I love your positive attitude despite some of your recent struggles- it's really commendable! I agree that I try to feed positive thoughts to my blog readers, instead of dwelling on the negative aspects of my life online.

    Xo, Hannah

  17. love this post. blogging is about being a positive community and sharing all the kick ass stuff that happens in our lives so we can look back on it and remember. and i think that you are doing everything right! you are young, beautiful, and motivated towards your passion. stick with it and you will be rewarded. you rock, lady!


  18. I think in any social media outlet we don't really show our true lives. It's for a lot of reasons... I mean, it can be really hard to open up sometimes. It's also hard because you have the people who CONSTANTLY have to show up only how amazing their lives are and it's like "oh, shut up". But then you have the people who only complain and you think "ugh, you shut up too". It's hard to find the right balance of staying real, positive, and relevant.

    But anyway. That's just what I think.

    You look really cute. Also.

    - April


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